Monday, August 11, 2014

I've messed up

This week is not going well.  I'm trying so hard each day to stay on the program, but my old habits are back.  I'm hungry and so I'm snacking.  I try to stick with what I'm "allowed" to have on the program, and just increase the portions.  But I'm just plain eating too much.  Mathematically, as I've said before, it doesn't make sense.  I'm still not eating enough calories to gain weight.  But I am.  So I'm hungry most of the day, craving stuff all day, and gaining weight.  I'm up 2 pounds since July 29th. 

The only way I know to fix this is to get back to Nazi style, like on day one...basically starting over.  I'm panicked, as I remember just how hard those first days and weeks were and I doubt my ability to be that strong again. 

And today is my birthday.  Can't even have something special.

I brought this on myself by cheating.  But seriously, are there Medifast users out there who can do this program for 4-5 months and NOT cheat?  Ever? 

Eh!! Just so frustrated and disappointed with myself.  I do NOT want to gain!

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